חינוך ילדים
Fighting Brothers
- כ"ה אדר א' התשע"ד
שאלה
My 4.5 years old son is beating my 2 years old son and I am afraid he will cause him a demage. What is the best way to educate the older son not to beat his younger brother? Thank you very much.
תשובה
Hello
Siblings jealousy is a very humen feeling by it´s nature. your 4.5 years old beating your 2 years old maybe because he´s expressing his frustration from having to share the parents love and attention.
siblings rivalry is inevitable. it´s important to show the child that our love for him is undamaged, that his place is safe and that the parents can love both him and his brother.
parental love, presence, investment and supporting attitude are an existential needs. that´s the reason for which childrens fight to guarantee having those criterions
regarding those specific cases, when he´s beating his brother, you should act on "reward & punishment" method. whenever he´s behaving in a good and acceptable way you need to reward him (hug, kiss, present, etc.) and when he´s behaving in an unacceptable way (such as beating his brother) you need to punish him (or at least ignore that specific behavior). slowly he will learn to act according to the behavior that rewards him.
we can not make siblings rivalry disappear and its not necessary, this battle is legitimate and thanks to it children often driven to accomplishments, learning, standing up for themselves and there rights.
all the best - Benjamin
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